Much love, Shaudeh Farjami

Get ready to level up mentally, emotionally, spiritually, energetically. It is all coming. Do not underestimate how much can change in the last few months of 2022… it is time to get serious about your goals. If your life just got a little more challenging, you are climbing up to the next level, Stay consistent, and trust your process. If you avoid risk and failure, you are avoiding success. Here are your two choices: evolve and level up, or repeat and hoover. Aim to be just 1% better than you were yesterday.

The secret to your future success is hidden in these reminders— reminders I needed to hear and still need day to day. 

First and foremost, to achieve the life you want, you need to take action. Internship season is approaching, a season college students know all too well. LinkedIn posts are overflowing, surfacing achievements lined up by your classmates. Instead of comparing yourself to your peers and questioning if you are falling behind, allow the outside noise to motivate you. Take the steps you need for your path, because odds are, your journey will look a lot different from the student sitting next to you in your major class. Not to mention, there are many way to embark a journey and end on a similar path. In other words, success is not a fixed road. The success of others should never be intimidating, it should be fueling. Your focus on your goals determines your reality. 

Rest is one of the most important parts of the evolution process. Having periods or days in your life that are less productive than others is okay. You might start your day at 7:15am, make your bed, fold your laundry, do your skincare routine… but crash on your phone and fall behind on the work you had set to complete before your 10:00am class. Since you slept in, you did not make time to eat the healthy breakfast you planned to cook. Ravenous after class, you pick up a fast food meal and spend the time allotted for daily exercise to catch up on the morning’s homework. That is life, my friend. You have to be okay with setbacks. I have definitely had moments where I spiral into negativity, ashamed of myself and disappointed. The recovery is about spinning the reality into a positive. 

The reality of my health journey, mentally and physically, is constantly changing in college: interests, weight, and the time in my day to day schedule to focus on my fitness journey. Our generation created the term: “Bod goals”. There is no need to look perfect because, to be frank, I am not perfect. Stay active for your mental health, not a physical goal. Weight increasing and decreasing is not what drives fitness goals, it should be your health and wellness. Your value as a college adolescent is not in your body image.

Until recently, I did not see people-pleasing as a bad quality. I am helping out others, people-pleasing is just being selfless— or so I ignorantly assumed. The focus you put on your own well-being is what will make you a better version of yourself. If you are not genuine to who you are, you are not showing up as your truthful, authentic self. People pleasing is a contradiction. In order to show up and support others, you need to do things in your best interest. If you are not in tune with yourself and what you truly need, you will not have the capacity to build others up. Learn the balance between helping others and putting yourself first. 

Value the way you treat yourself, and the way you are treated by others. You have to start believing that you deserve beyond the bare minimum. Sometimes, the reason you do not achieve what you want or who you want is because you deserve a whole lot better. The mindset is crucial to self-respect and self-worth. Shifting your perspective reveals the silver lining. The way you view life, and your relationships, is the life you will live. Know your worth, and do not get caught up in the little things. 

Time is not your enemy, time can be your partner in crime. Do not let time to be an excuse, instead, learn to manage it correctly when it comes to forming relationships and taking care of yourself. You have the power to make time or to make it the right time. (Refer to my blog “The Falsities of Time“.) When it comes to the social life of a college student, there is so much value in learning to use the weekends to build the life you want instead of escaping the life you have. Despite the long-life span of my social battery, my battery has been humbled by the chaotic dynamism of college life this semester. I have found a greater appreciation for a slow night in. Recharging, being productive, ordering a comfort meal, and watching a movie is just as valuable as a socially demanding night out. 

Lastly, your friendships and your relationships should always add to your life. They should not become your entire life. Saying this one louder for the people in the back. The holidays ring in the honeymoon season. Your life does not revolve around your relationship, your relationship should only compliment your life. If a person is taking up all your mental capacity, you will fall behind and lose your sense of self. This applies to friendships and romantic relationships. Leave room to tap into yourself and stay in tune.

Much love,

Shaudeh Farjami